A Break From the Story

So... a little siesta from the faber (story) of Ryan Robertson.

I read Psalm 139 for a quiet time just a little ago.

It's so hard to understand that I have been searched and known (v. 1) by the Almighty God. Oh, but I want to know! To know how am held and led by His right hand, in the depths, in hell, and though I "dwell in the uttermost part of the sea"! (vv. 8-10)

One thing I've struggled with for a while is a lack of self-respect. I talked about this with my mom last night, and she encouraged me to think if I were my best friend, what I would think of myself. That... kind of shuts me up. I sort of... invent problems for myself when I think too much. I project situations that don't exist, outcomes that aren't likely or even possible, usually negative. It runs in my family.

And, if I do that... if I think from the perspective of someone who watched my everyday life and knew me very well... (it is hard for me to say any of this) I would see a piercing, striving intellect, bent on seeking God's will in every circumstance, committed to quiet, godly living, cultivating God's standards in my friendships, and relationships with women, treating other people with respect and care, prayerful, committed to time alone with my Creator and Redeemer, committed to forgiveness and grace, even after being violated, cultivating my talents of drumming, poetry, public speaking, teaching, and wisdom, broken, humble, only by the grace of God, with a hard work ethic in many aspects of life, including school, friendships, and my relationship with the Lord.

It's so hard to say all this because it seems arrogant, but it's true: I ought to view myself as God views me. He calls me "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139). Shall I call bad what God calls good? Shall I call lacking what God has filled, or sinful what God has redeemed? Shall I so divorce His will from mine that I forget that Yahweh's "call and his promise are irrevocable" (Romans 11). Ha, it's pretty funny because I'm watching Toy Story right now with Raju, my little brother. It's the part where Buzz Lightyear has a rocket strapped to his back and his depressed because he's just a toy, not a Space Ranger after all. He's forgetting that his Master (Andy) thinks he's very special. Andy has his room decorated with Buzz Lightyear memorabilia, but Buzz doesn't care. Andy has Buzz Lightyear bedsheets, and slept with Buzz at night, but Buzz doesn't care. His Master loves him, misses him, wants him to come home and wants him to KNOW how much he means to Himself. Instead Sid--Buzz's enemy, thus Andy's enemy, and for analogical purposes, Satan--has Buzz strapped to a rocket and scheduled to blow up in a little while. Andy is Buzz's only hope, yet he wallows in self-pity.

WHY do we neglect God's eternal, infinite declaration of our worth in Jesus Christ? Why do we forget His writing on our souls, as Andy had written on the sole of Buzz's shoe?

I forget often that grace of identity. I am the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21). I am beloved by the God who holds the universe in the palm of His hand.

Father, engrave on my heart your love. Let me always remember your grace through your Son Jesus Christ, my Savior and Redeemer.

Oh, another cool thing I've been thinking about is in Isaiah 9, how it prophecies that Jesus will be born to save Israel and to the virgin. It's talking about Jesus, and it says "He shall be called, Wonderful Counselor, Almighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace". Jesus is the Wonderful Counselor. The Holy Spirit is also called the the Counselor when Jesus talks about Him and how He will send Him. Jesus and the Holy Spirit are one and the same, but also distinct. Jesus is the Almighty God. There is only One True God (Ephesians 4:5-6), and the Father and Holy Spirit are also called God. Jesus is the Everlasting Father, but He also prays to the Father and is One with the Father. They are the same, yet distinct. Jesus is the Prince of Peace, which is his Sonship. Jesus is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and the Father is also Father, Son and Holy Spirit, and the Spirit is also Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. If you have one, you have all three. You cannot have one without having all three. You must know all three to know one, and you must know one to know all three.

The Trinity.

Gratias lectenti (Thanks for reading),
Valete amici